we've got a big big mess
it was a sunday that my boyfriend and i spent the entire day together. it was that saturday that i first got the feeling of impending doom in the pit of my stomach. like something bad was going to happen. like i was going to have to break up with him some time in the near future. i lied and told him i just felt off and i felt so horrid that he was trying so hard to make me smile and all i did was scowl, that by the time we were talking back to my house from the local shop-ko, i was laughing and smiling because i reverted back to being his best friend instead of his girlfriend, if only in my own mind. when we got back to my house, i felt the same - gloomy, tired, irritated, and like a meteor was hurtling towards earth. over the next few days, i'd texted and talked back and forth with my best friend to try and work out my feelings instead of just talking to him. it was a wednesday afternoon when i parted with him at the bus
stop and feeling like the feeling had passed - i
didn't want to lose him or leave him. i wanted him to be my boyfriend, and i wanted to enjoy it. i wanted to be happy. it was the very next day that my brother took me aside and told me he was in jail for domestic abuse against his ex girlfriend the night before. i didn't cry. strangely not, perhaps i should have. he got out that afternoon. i didn't feel too affected, even after i had to recount the events to my mother and my sister. i didn't cry when i knew i would have to break up with him. i didn't want to cry. i'd had enough crying. when i called him later that night, i ended up crying. and i hated him for it. because i'd had enough crying. i'm done crying. no matter how unloveable it makes me.
Mom and dad
I feel bad, but I really hate both of my parents. They did their best, but their best really sucked. I wish I had never been born.
I wish I could just let it go
I am madly in love with a girl in my office. I am happily married and love my wife. She is newly married and her husband is a great guy. But for the life of me I can't stop thinking about her. I don't know what to do.
I just lost...
I am a gambling addict...I have lost over 7400$ this month alone. I hate myself. I am such a loser. Why would anyone want to be like this. It is not the life at all. I am constantly cheating myself and my family. I think I would be better off dead. DO NOT GAMBLE
I'm a drunk and a liar. May God forgive me. So sorry.
You and me again
my entire day can turn based on whether or not i get a text from you. but now i'm constantly worried that you will text me when my boyfriend is around. i can't believe you and i are back in this same situation we were in 3 years ago. and i'm so glad you're still in love with me.
I used to have this best friend. One day i finally told him that i was in love with him, and surprisingly he loved me too =]. Those days were the best in my life, we would talk for hours and hours, thinking minutes had passed by. Until one day, he just stopped talking to me. I moved on, thinking he was just another jerk. Months have passed since i talked to him, but i will always love him. i Still hang on, thinking something'll happen. When my mind know nothing is going to go on. My heart doesn't accep that answer. When i see he's online, i want to tell him i love him and miss him. But i never get the courage to. I know i can't keep going on like this,and that sometime i will crack. But until then, all i can do is keep it inside. I just hope that nothing bad happens.
I can't really hope that. Seeing as he is 20 and i'm underage still. Horrible things that happen in life, an that's one of them. I also have to say that i really want to rip my moms head off. She's making me move halfway across the world, again. What the heck is she thinking, how am i suposed to settle down, and think of what i want to do in the future if she just wants to keep changing personalities.
Drowning In Memories
It's been six years and I still wake thinking of her and it haunts me, then I take her to sleep with me. I hold her in my dreams. She speaks to me. She looks at me, like she used to, like she still wants too. I don't know how to let her go. I can't shake her.
I'm still in love with you, even though we broke up so long ago. I guess you'll never feel the same way about me, but I still love you with all of my heart. You were my first love and you've always been there for me. Sometimes I want to tell you how I feel but I know you wouldn't like it. I just have to be contented with the sweet agony it is to be around you at work. I wish more than anything that you would just reach out and touch me. Your smile makes me melt on the inside, and when you say my name I always smile. I love you.
Forgive me, God. I don't treat people with as much love as I have for them. I want to forgive everybody.
I want to stop lying, cheating, and being vain. I have had enough of my own sin, and I repent and ask for God's forgiveness.
A nasty man
I hate my husband. He is the meanest, most insensitive, rude, obnoxious, nasty, man anyone can ever meet. I walk on eggshells when I am around him because I never know what will set him off. I try to avoid situations where I have to be in public with him. I have no idea how I ended up with him. I am stuck with him because I don't know how to get away from him. I must have been possessed to marry him. His parents treated him lousy and he never learned love from them. I pray every day that he gets into a car accident and dies or at least becomes comatose that I can unplug him. He's a lawyer and so am I; isn't that crazy? and I can't figure a way out. I have to make sure the two boys don't end up just like him. If you read this, please pray for that car accident...
I don't think I will ever get over my first love. I'm happily married, but whenever I come across an old letter or photo of or from my ex, it still breaks my heart. Will I ever get over him? It's been ten years by the way
Never going to happen.
My brother has this friend which I found very attractive from the first time we met which was like 5 years ago? I was always really geeky and dorky around him but I didn't know better.
Two years ago, my brother went to work abroad and invited me to visit him in the foreign country he was in. I went and his friend happened to have gone to visit him there, too.
The whole time I was geeky and dorky and slowly and subtly starting to feel things for him. The time we spent together started meaning more and more. There was almost this romantic tension when we were alone but nobody would do anything. I think my brother saw a bit of the tension so he tried to be present whenever he could.
Now this hot friend has a girlfriend who he's gone traveling a few times with and I'm pretty sure they're going to end up together for another while.
Breaks my heart a little bit but because I fell for him in such a subtle way, my mind prepared to discover that he had a good girlfriend. If only I could phone him and it not be weird...
I love a married woman that isn't my wife
I've recently reconnected with an old friend/girlfriend. We were always close and connected on a very deep level, but I was too stupid and self-centered to commit to her. We fell out of touch for a long time. I've been married for over 13 years with 2 kids and thought I was happy... until I started chatting with my friend again. She's recently married and I want so badly to break them up so she'll be with me. I've realized that I don't really love my wife anymore and never loved her on the same level as my friend. But I don't want to hurt my kids. The pain of being seperated from my friend is almost unbearable. We chat every day. I should feel guilty, but I don't. I think about my friend even when I kiss my wife and tell her I love her. I fantasize about leaving her.
I became a wiccan 6 years ago through online courses. Nobody knows. I don't pretend to be religious, but I think if people knew this they'd think I was crazy.
Got my boss back
We have a HUGE jerk of a supervisor where I used to work. She loves to humiliate her employees and is even super rude to customers. The last shift I worked with her we got in a nasty argument and I decided I was done working there.
That same day I went on the company's website and wrote a HUGE complaint about her, pretending to be a customer (because I know they don't take employee complaints seriously). A few days later my friend told me the girl had gotten in a lot of trouble because of a complaint, I knew it was mine! I don't feel a bit bad about it, she deserved it, I watched too many people take her nastyneess and never complain. I just wish she'd been fired.
I love stealing, I think I actually have a problem. When I'm alone in a room in someone's house or at work I rifle through people's belongings. I've taken really stupid things that I don't need, I think that's a real sign of a mental problem.
I worked at the same place for 5 years and took money all the time. It was just so darn easy. By the end I was taking at least 50 bucks a shift. The worst part is I really don't feel bad about it. Now I don't work there and I'm so poor all the time, I'm not used to living without the extra income. I guess it serves me right.