Dumb.com >> Jokefight
Vote For Your Favorite Joke

I can't decide!

A man walks into a Chinese restaurant but is told...
A man walks into a Chinese restaurant but is told by the Maitre'd that there will be at least a twenty minute wait."Would you like to wait in the bar, Sir?", he says. The man goes into the bar and the bartender says, "What'll it be?"The man replies, "Give me a Stoli with a twist."The bartender pauses for a few seconds, then smiles andsays, "Once upon time, there were FOUR little peegs . . . "

A test for being drunk
A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes.

He goes up to the guy's window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."

The man says, "Sorry officer I can't do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I'll have a really bad asthma attack."

"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample." "I can't do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I'll bleed to death."

"Well, then we need a urine sample."

"I'm sorry officer I can't do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I'll get really low blood sugar."

"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."

"I can't do that, officer."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm too drunk to do that!"




Latest Joke Fight Results:

  • An ode to old age was a winner against Nine Words Women Use
  • A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights... was a winner against The Passing of an Old Friend
  • Funny Words of Wisdom was a winner against A problem with teeth
  • A dog for a wife was a winner against Funny Words of Wisdom
  • Parent Job Description was a winner against A bad habit
  • The Passing of an Old Friend was a winner against A farmer and his wife went into town for...
  • Nine Words Women Use was a winner against A guy was driving home one evening...
  • Funny Laws was a winner against A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights...
  • The Passing of an Old Friend was a winner against Before and After in Marriage
  • A couple have not been getting along for years... was a winner against Funny Laws