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I hate myself
when i was younger i did some things that i am now still not able to admit to people. it stops me from becoming close to people i meet and may become friends with. i can t stop thinking about the things i did and people i destroyed. death will be my release but i won't kill myself cause of my family and its a dumb way to fix" your problems so i will be living with these thoughts until i die of natural causes or something else. "
We really don't love each other
I don't really love him -- I think I'm with him because he's the only one who will ever put up with me. Sad part is, I know the only reason he does so is because he is too afraid to leave because his self-confidence is so low. If he even had a bit more self confidence, he would never be with me, because he really doesn't love me either. We're together because we're afraid to be alone, not because we love each other.
Lost love that could have been
Iím in love with a girl 700km away, who recently broke up in her relationship and was in love with me for a little while. Iím in a relationship with a girl already, but am never sure if she is the one, not like the girl I found.
Now she has found someone else that I am friends with and it has crushed me inside that it could have been me. Not knowing for sure hurts me even more, because I still think about her all the time, and how much I guess I shouldnít love her.
Life will go on, but iíll always try to remember what I could have had with MM.
I was his secret but we were so in love, it was perfect; best friends and lovers until he chose the religion he didnt believe in. I still hate him for the decision he made.
I love a girl I have never seen in person.... We use to chat and have contacts thro'mail... I like the way she behaves... The way she makes me feel...
Maybe I am CRANKY...
Every day, I try to keep from willingly sinning. I am conscientious of what I say and do. Despite this, I have horrible thoughts that pop up into my head unwillingly. They started off as just one or two bad thoughts a day and it's now gotten up to 20+ unwanted thoughts a day. The thoughts are really horrible, ranging from flashes of my family's pet dog being stabbed repeatedly to my friends being decapitated--things that are so repulsive to me that I can't believe that I am even capable of such thoughts. I've tried to pray the thoughts away, but they still haven't subsided. I hate them and they scare me, but I don't know what to do. I don't want to go to a psych because I don't want anyone to know that I have this problem. I feel like an evil person. I wish someone could help me.
hope her ticket doubled
This old roommate of mine had a bad bad falling out. We absolutely hate each other. I happened to see her car, and I'm positive it was hers, parked one day on the side of the street by my house. She had a parking violation ticket on the front windshield. Well, I know that if you don't pay a parking ticket in 3 weeks or so, it will double in price, soooo I walked right over and quickly grabbed it off the car. If she never knew about it then she would never pay it in three weeks, right? hahaha hope her ticket doubled.
Sometimes, I wish I'd been "the fat kid" when I was younger. I used to be pretty shy, and I'm still really insecure and self-concious, so I might as well have been the guy who could sit on people when he got mad at them :P Also, it seems like all the kids who were like that when they were younger are better at working out nowadays, so... Anyway, as weird as it might be, I'm actually trying to gain weight now, muscle and fat, so, yeah :P
plastic surgery nut
I don't know why you bothered getting restilin in your super skinny lips, you look ridiculous. You could have really used some work on your eyes instead.
Jeckyl and Hyde
I have fake Facebook and AOL profiles to talk to people on my friends list to piss them off and cause fights with eachother.I act like the "other woman or man" to split up a couple so i can have dibbs on that guy,then i turn around when they come to me and look like the angel and i console them..i also get on chat rooms and aggrevate on purpose just because im bored as hell.i cause sooo many stresses and yet,im the only one they have in the end..i love the attention..lmao!
Fooling ones self
I have been doing business since a long time and earning pretty well, but lately there has been a slump in my work, i havent got any new business since i am addicted to the internet and thats what i do everyday, i come to the office only to find myself surfing the internet and this continues for hours, when i go back home i feel very guilty since i have a family to support that includes my wife my mother and two daughters. I want to get out of this syndrome and start doing stuff to earn, but looks like i am in a trap, just sitting there in the office doing nothing ....
God help me please.
i look up pictures of people online who are skinny. I want to be them. i recite the mantras that are on the pictures in my head over and over again. I keep a journal on how much i eat and how much i work out. each day i feel like its too much. even when i feel like fainting i still try not to eat. You indulge, you buldge.
Many years back one day in my drunken state made an abusive call to my friends mother. I pretend to not acknowledge it but, from within I know what I did was wrong, and she knows it was me. It has hurt me all this while and I know it would keep hurting me for the rest of my life, I 've lost a friend in doing so and every time I run into her I feel miserable and scared that she might just catch me and ask me why I did what I did. Don't know why but, sure 'm shamed of this act of mine and hate myself everyday more for the same reason...
Somebody lost his job...
I did something in the past out of just mere curiosity and maybe for my stupid reasons and actually ended up having this person lose his job. I don't have the courage to go and seak his forgivness and I think I don't deserve it either. He did not do any harm to me nor did he hurt me in anyway, when I realised my stupidity it was too late. I chickened out for the first time in my life and was scared to comeout in open. I 've lived with this for almost about 8 years now but the burden is too much to bear. I seak his forgiveness. I hope he would and would have moved on in life. I hope he gets all that he had then and now dreams of in his life... Please forgive me I didn't realise my action would cost you your job.
i used to think we might be together. then she got married. today i learned she is now divorced.
we have started talking again and are meeting next week. i can't stop thinking about her. my current 'girlfriend' is several hours away - it is not going anywhere. i haven't been this wrapped up about a girl in years. trying to play it cool, but i really want her BAD
I am a 28 your old who just found out from her mom's boyfriend that she was in the E.R. for severe vertigo. Your thinking so what right. Well let me say this. I have lived in another state from my mom for 6 years. In the six years my mom has been through emotional crap and family drama than we had when i lived there. We have a had 2 sudden and unexpected deathers in our family. My mom and grandfather were deeply upset about these. And in some depression and guilt and need me, the support of me. We are all we have. Where was I , here thousands of miles away, across the country. I am never home when she needs me . Yes, I fly home when the happens but it is not the same. I can only stay for a while and then need to come back to my family. I feel like I should be there, move back home . She needs me, but then I always talk myself out of it. She has been there for me always. Through it all. I mean some crazy stuff, I have put my mom
through hell. And here I set. Just go off the phone and all I can say is Thanks for letting me know. I can't do anything for her, can't stop by, can't be there for her like she is always there for me. I feel horrible. At that moment when I picked up the phone, I see it is her number and it's not her calling, and you hear I have something I need to tell you. My heart stopped. I thought oh my god this is it. Something has happend to my one and only parent. What am I going to do. It was not as bad as my gut reaction but still . Am i the worst daughter? At this moment I would say yes.
They say marriage is hard work . . . .
I think this is a lie people in bad marriages tell themselves to feel better about marrying the wrong person. My marriage is no work at all. School is work. Jobs are work. Family is often work. Marriage is fun.
Is everyone else just going along with this myth, or are there really that many bad matches? Or have we accidentally stumbled onto the secret - by waiting to marry until we had enough money to live on, by not having kids?
Or is he really doing all the work for over a decade, and I am just taking advantage?
Keeping things to myself
You know, when you know someone likes you...you start to think that they're not bad and then bam! after a while all you can think about is whether he's checking out your butt when you're bending or whether he's smelling your hair when your back is facing him. Well, there's this guy (who used to be prettyyy fat but then went on an excessive weight loss drive and lost a lot but he still isn't exactly attractive.) call him M. He started liking me in 2005 when we just talked generally and he didn't have many friends. Then we became sort of good friends the next year when we had a lot of classes together and he told me about the people he liked. I didn't EVER think about him. Not once in a mushy way. And then at the end of 2006 he started flirting with me. Of course, I was confused and just ignored him. (Just FYI- I'm not exactly thin and pretty in a way that hits your face. I'm 5 or 7 kilos overweight and I wear spectacles.
) So yeah. Then in the middle of last year he got really close to me. I was also sort of falling for him pretending I wasn't. Now I don't know why he won't just get it out and over with so I'm always waiting for him to make it obvious, when I know that's not the point.
What should I do?
Continue ignoring him and his subtle (REALLY subtle) moves or declare that I like him. I'm scared that if I do...I might just not like him.