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i'm 20 years
i'm 20 years old. i made out with my TA (teaching assistant) who is 31 years old.
Havent been doin
Havent been doin qt's as much as i should be. Also I should get more involved at church.
this one time
this one time in grade school most of my friends got in trouble for throwing grass clumps but I didn't even though I had partaken in the offense and I never did confess to it letting my friends take the brunt of the punishment of which I received none.
ive always thought
ive always thought of myself as a good friend but i find myself being annoyed by friends easily. I find little things become annoying because i feel the friends i have are not fully appreciating my friendship or not willing to help me in my time of need. Sometimes i juss want to yell
One thing that
One thing that really pisses me off is when people try to teach me something that I already know. I get angry and very bitter~ and then I feel all bad... Pride seems to always get in the way of good times to relearn something.
i haven't gone
i haven't gone to church since senior year in HS, and i haven't felt a need to. now i feel empty inside.
I've been going
I've been going to church all my life, as far back as I can remember. This is my last year in college and now I've been to church like twice in 2 months. I don't know why I'm not going anymore. It's not that I don't believe in God anymore but rather that I don't feel like I have a good church I can go to...
Sometimes I can't
Sometimes I can't stand my roommate. I just wish they would stop using my stuff, stop being hypocritical, and stop being so damn insensitive... I feel bad that I feel this way and I've tried to look on the brighter side of living with them, but overall it's just a really annoying situation.
I still love
I still love her deeply. What am I to think what she is doing with her life is wrong, I'm not a part of it anymore. Maybe I'm just being over protective of her or maybe i just know her well enough that shes making another mistake in her life... who knows. Now that i have confessed my love for her, it's time to lock away these feelings and move on with my life.
I remember...every time
I remember...every time i think bout her...i just think of what i could have had with her. I always think about how she was the coolest chick, almost perfect for me. Only if i had more time, maybe if i lived in a different location...somethin could have happened...who knows. All i gotta do now is find a chica that even compares to her, cuz its hard...real hard.
This isn't anything
I know I am not alone in this but at times, actually all the time I feel so inadequate. It's as if I do not measure to anyone or in anything I do. I wonder sometimes if I should just tell myself that things are good enough or if I strive to do better and be better.
when i'm at
when i'm at work, i usually surf the internet for 80% of the day. i just act really busy. like george castanza on seinfeld
i have to
i have to work 8 hours for this doode at work cus i'm covering his shift and i dont want to. but i will cus i'm a champ. :)
i have a
i have a problem with lying. sometimes it's helpful because i don't like hurting other people's feelings. but other times, it just comes out. i am a compulsive liar.
I'm constantly paranoid.
I'm constantly paranoid. I think everybody is out to get me, even those who profess their love for me. Oftentimes, I purposefully isolate myself, causing delusional waking nightmares.
Jesus has and
Jesus has and always will be my sole purpose in this life... even though im so jacked up, full of ugliness, darkness, evil... i know that I am forever loved by a love that I will never fully comprehend... sigh*
today i was
today i was with my friend and he got a call from my other girlfriend. i could totally hear them talking and i overheard her inviting him to a party coming up. she listed off all the people going and my ex was one of them. after they hung up, she never called me. i knew this was going to happen- that sooner or later, since me & my ex were in the same friend group that they'd start picking one of us to events and not the other. I plastered a smile to my face all day, but i was SO ANNOYED/PISSED/FRUSTRATED/SAD/ and really really bothered, but i know its really stupid to feel this way. Honestly, i just wish my ex would move away and give me my friends back. Or maybe I should move away and get a group of new friends.
my best friend
my best friend and i are drifting apart since we go to colleges in different towns. we pretend like everything is fine. we talk on the phone but we seem so distant now and when she comes back into town during the weekends we try to hang out, but with my job i have to work and we don't get to spend the time we use to. i'm scared that i'm losing my best friend and there is nothing i can do about it, everyone else thinks we are still the best friend duo we were in high school but we aren't anymore and this is the first time i've admited it to myself. i cry because if lose her i know i will lose a part of who i am and all i will have left are my memories.
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