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i broke up
i broke up with my girlfriend thinking that we met too early. for a while i felt like she was the one. i still do but now that we're not together everytime we talk it seems that she is less interested in me everyday. i wish i could take all the bad stuff i did back but i know that if i was with her i'd be curious to see what else was out there. it seems that there is something else going on in her life and i can't figure out what it is. i just really hope that she's not getting over me because now that it seems like he is i fear i will lose her and will never find the comfort she gives me anywhere else. it seems that people try so hard to get what they can't have and once they get it they don't want it anymore. i wish i could understand why this is so. why can't i just be content with what i have and make the best of it instead of thinking of what my life would be if i had chosen another path. sometimes i feel so empty and hollow,
it's hard to find something that truly makes me happy and something that i feel i can put my effort into. it seems that whenever i try to put effort and work into something it falls apart which makes me not want to start anything again. i'm so apprehensive about everything now.
i am staying in a relationship with my girlfriend because i don't want any other guys to have her, even though i don't want to be with her that much
i'm the type
i'm the type of guy that will fart in the car and not say anything. i'm the type of guy that will also fart at a restruant; if its silent i'll say "damn..who farted" and blame it on whoever is sitting next to me
I hate my
I hate my life. I have no friends at school. I have lost contact with most of my old friends. I don't hang out with anybody. I only know a couple of people from high school and the rest of the people I know are from my work. I go through most days on campus without talking to anybody. I am so insecure and self-conscious. I always feel awkward and alone. I have never had a girlfriend. I complain a lot, but in reality my life is pretty easy.
I turned down
I turned down the first guy that ever asked me out 3 years ago. He was really sweet, but it seemed he was just desperate. (2 days later he was going out with my best friend) Now that I've had other boyfriends who were all jerks, I feel bad. I should have said yes.
I broke up
I broke up with my ex in early Feb because there was so much drama. She was a compulsive liar and there were alot of issues I couldn't take anymore. I was with her for 2 1/2 years and she has a daughter who is turning 4 this month. I loved them both so much and still do but it would never work. I think about them all the time and just yesterday my ex called for the first time. I wanna be with her again but at the same time I don't. So confused ....
when I was
when I was 16, this kid that was 18 was selling cigarettes for 6$ a pack and I bought two..
i'm a chronic smoker now and i can't quit
I'm materialistic and
I'm materialistic and recently, things have been getting out of control. If a bag isn't Louis Vuitton or Gucci, I won't carry it. If jewelry isn't from Tiffanys, I won't wear it. I spend my parents' money on accessories because I feel as if I "need" them and after a while, I feel guilty. I try to stop but its like a never ending cycle I go through.
i'm 19 and
i'm 19 and have never had a girl friend, never been in a serious relationship, none of that. i do feel somewhat behind...and it'd mean so much to me to tell some girl how pretty and happy she makes me. To tell her "you're just really really pretty..." would just rock my world.
ever since i
ever since i broke up with my last boyfriend a few months ago, i've been thinking of him all the time. it makes it hard to live, because i haven't met a guy as wonderful as him. and the worst part is, he doesn't even know if he still loves me or not, so i don't know if we'll end up together again in the end. goddamnit... ._.
I don't think
I don't think college is for me. All my senses, all my reasonings tell me to go through the motions, do what I need to do to graduate, go to grad school, get a respectable job, make alot of money and support the family I don't even have yet. I suppose deep down somewhere a part of me wants this too, wants to lead the normal life.
I'm enlisting in the Marine Crops. I feel the call in my heart and in my soul and I know that I don't want to live someone else's life. I'm still going to try to stay in college, but what happens will happen. I hope my girlfriend loves me enough to understand for I love her more than breath.
I'm sorry mom and dad. I will make you proud in a different way.
this past summer
this past summer i went on a cruise to Alaska. there was this incredibly good looking guy on board. but i was too scared to talk to him. after months have passed i still think about him. this is the first time i've ever regretted not having the guts to say something.
My girl friend
My girl friend keeps refering to me as "little man" or "peanuts." We have been dating for almost two years now, and I cannot take it anymore. I cannot bear to even look at peanuts no more.
i'm so tired
i'm so tired of waiting for 'the one' to come along... aren't you? =(
I can't handle
I can't handle life. That's a fact. I dislike it how life tends to be unfair, but at the same time since we're human we may never understand God's way. Our minds are so limited and we're so narrow-minded so why do we question things that will just make us more mad or sad? We're just stubborn and selfish people. That seriously sucks. I wish so badly that things of this world could change, but change doesn't just happen, it begins in the people first. Everyone hurts, everyone feels sorrow, everyone feels joy, so why do we act like we're the only ones that go through certain situations when there is always someone else out there that's in a more worse condition than us? I dislike it how just living in the U.S./cali sheltered me and put this comfortable living on my life. Though its a blessing it's hard for me to step out of my comfort zone and just pray with a pure and genuine heart for those that need it or want to feel God's true
love and never feel empty again.
Even though I sometimes say I hate people or even church, I still love them because I kno no one is perfect. So to love people or someone I hate is something that I gain 10x more than loving someone that loves me back.
i constantly dwell
i constantly dwell on my poor actions, the past, and any other problems that i have. It keeps me up late at night, and i cant sleep. i try to talk to friends, but i feel alone still. i dont know what to do anymore and its hurting my grades, and affecting my perspective on life...and i'm just going crazy. i feel like i'm going to break down and cry.
i've been really
i've been really depressed for a long time. I'm really unhappy about my life right now. I miss my friends who somehow drifted apart. I'm always stressed out about school. I'm stressed out about my parents and their financial issues. I just want to be able to take charge and fix things for myself so badly but I just cant do this alone. Things have fallen apart, and I don't know how i'm supposed to move on.
My roomate is
My roomate is falling for my high school sweetheart. It feels like she's invading my territory. I'm feeling really jealous even though i know i should just stand back.